Category: Topics

It always boils down to you!

Life is what you make of it.

You are given a set of cards to play this “game” of life and how you play it is totally up to you. Some people get a good deal to begin with and some not so good. Others get a right-bum deal altogether. However, it’s how we “play” those cards we have been dealt that is the key.

You can play the “victim” if you don’t like your cards and have a “whoa is me” attitude and stay down. Or you can play your cards in a manner that tries to improve your situation and circumstance, the choice of how you play YOUR cards is always yours.

Different mindset, different attitude. Different result!

This is all by playing your cards using YOUR choices.

Now of course you don’t know how your choices are gonna pan out of course. But what you do need to understand is that they are YOUR choices. You can choose “HOW” you want to respond to stuff and how you want to play your hand in life.

Realising you have this power of choice is liberating as you can influence your outcome and most people don’t realise they have this choice.

Even not choosing IS A CHOICE

So choose wisely.

No one has seen what is inside that orange until you peel it open and look beneath the surface.
No one knows what it contains “exactly” until they have looked inside.

They can have an idea of what they will find of course, but until it is peeled, no one knows exactly 100%.

The same applies to you!

No one else knows exactly what you contain inside of you until they peel away the surface and see all that is underneath.

Is what they find worth seeing?

Is what you have under the surface magical for all mankind to benefit?

Or will seeing under the surface of who you are reveal something no one wants to see?

Only you can decide what that is…

Make sure you expose a wonderful side that can make a difference.

The strange thing is, other people can “think” they know what they will find inside of you, but they can’t know for sure. Only YOU determine what the world sees.

Will they get someone who is just a taker in life and doesn’t give anything back? Just a sponge sucking in the things in life but not giving anything worthwhile back?

Or will others find something in you that surprises them? Or even takes their breath away?

Someone who has chosen to “free their magic” and use and release the talents that you have tucked away?

You can choose what others see, so choose wisely.

Doesn’t make you feel good when you’re with them…
Doesn’t make you laugh occasionally…
Doesn’t praise and lift you when you are in need of being lifted…
Doesn’t attend to your needs when you’re most vulnerable…
Seems rather to be a drain most of the time…

Then they wouldn’t be your friend, would they?

So why do some of us accept partners who are like this?

Why do we let some people who we are in an intimate relationship with, treat us this way?

Life’s too short to be with people who are ‘drains’

Find those “right” people that uplift your soul and make you feel great, especially if you choose them as a partner for more intimate relationships.

Think more than once before you get into any sort of relationship with people who drain!

What is your self-confidence like? Do you back yourself?

Do you like how you act in life and are happy with who you are?

Normally, our self-confidence can take a battering throughout our lives because we have had to listen to the word “NO” on many occasions, and being told “no” in whatever capacity, is like a very light form of rejection, as you cannot do the thing which has resulted in hearing the word “no”.

Whilst “no” could be said by someone in authority as a way of protecting us, many of us having heard the word “no” thousands of times during our lives, sometimes take this stoppage in what we want to do, as something we are doing wrong, so we are somehow “less”.

This is entirely crooked thinking, and can and does undermine our self-confidence. Just because an action cannot be performed, the action can be delayed or amended. An action is something we “do” it is not a part of who we “are”

This is why most adults take these insecurities which have their source in childhood and falsely apply them into adulthood, therefore believing we are not quite good enough.

This stifles our confidence and self-worth and therefore we become apprehensive and don’t get as much fulfilment in life as we should, falsely believing we “shouldn’t” try because of the false conditioning of all the “no’s” over the years.

This does not serve us well in adulthood as it stifles us from achieving what we want to try and achieve.

This can be changed just by changing some of the vocabulary we use on a day-to-day basis. Instead of doubting ourselves, maybe introduce the word “YET” into our vocabulary.

So if something doesn’t go to plan, or we haven’t managed to do, it’s because we haven’t perhaps quite mastered it…Yet!

This slight shift in language means what we currently can’t do isn’t forever. It gives scope to believe we can go again until we DO get things right. This builds confidence over time, meaning we are starting to believe in ourselves.

So improving our confidence is not something that can happen overnight, but we can get there step-by-step by changing our vocabulary slightly.

“Don’t wait to show the world your magic”

The world is ready for you now. 
Go on…don’t be afraid. Take that step to show the world what you really can bring to the table.

Just go for it and let out your talent.

“But, Tony, I don’t know what talent I have?”

That’s ok, just go and try things you like. Because normally with things you like, you can find something there that you are then passionate about. And if you are passionate about something than you can share YOUR energy and enthusiasm about it to others.

Passion naturally brings energy and enthusiasm, so sharing that with others, is bringing your talent to the world!

You don’t even need to excel at anything in particular, just bringing passion to things you love doing is mostly enough.

So free you magic to the world, they need to see you passion and if you discover you have talent for something too, then all the better!

As we live in a small village, we get the same delivery driver for many packages we order and he is a cheery guy who always makes time to chat and smile even when he has to deliver packages in awful weather conditions (we are in the UK after all and the weather here can be rather awful)

Anyway, I stopped him one day when he came to deliver a package and water was literally dripping down his face because of the horrendous rain, but he still smiled as he gave me the package.

“Tom”, I said, “how come you are always cheery? It’s a wonderful trait so please don’t lose it, but why are you always so happy?”

He replied, “Happiness is a choice! And I choose to be happy”

“I used to grumble all the time about life’s pressures and it didn’t achieve anything. All the moaning and grumbling did was make me even more depressed. So I decided enough is enough, I need to choose to be happy, even if problems appeared, I chose to control my attitude and I did! And life has been so much better ever since. Of course, I still get problems, but I don’t moan about them anymore. I just deal with them and that’s it. I keep my emotions out of it”

“I now don’t like mixing with people who are always moaning and groaning. If only more people were happy with life, the whole world would be a great place!”

What a wonderful attitude. Tom realised that moaning about life didn’t solve anything to do with whatever problem he encountered.

So instead he “chose” to be happy and deal with issues in a happy frame of mind. This made solving the problems he could influence so much easier and left him feeling so much better too without compounding any stress he may have felt.

Couldn’t we be more like Tom and keep the issue away from our emotions? And “choose” to be happy?

Of course, we can!

We are constantly talking to ourselves and the crazy thing is, we are listening too!

So what we say to ourselves makes a HUGE difference to how things turn out. You see how the subconscious part of our brain (or our being) can tap into things we don’t fully understand, but we do know that it is powerful. So if you speak negatively to yourself, then the subconscious part is looking for negative things to confirm what you have said.

The opposite is true if you talk positively to yourself. Your subconscious part will look for positive things to confirm what you have just told it.

So you must be very careful what you say to yourself in the everyday conversations you have with yourself, and these conversations throughout a day count possibly into the hundreds.

If the majority of these conversations are negative, you will discover negative things are drawn to you and vice versa. If the majority of conversations with yourself are positive, you will discover positive things are drawn to you.

So try as much as possible to have positive conversations with yourself when you are talking to yourself. These conversations aren’t always going to be “sweetness and light” of course, because “life” throws challenges our way and we have to deal with them.

But do try and make a point of ensuring that the vast majority of this self-talk conversation is positive, so you will indeed attract more positive outcomes.