Author: Tony Fasulo

Life can be simple or complicated, it really IS up to you

Complicated Approach

If you choose to take the complicated approach, then you choose to sweat all the issues that get thrown your way, be they big or small issues. And I can guarantee that you WILL get issues thrown your way.

You can then fret, worry and generally immerse yourself in the issue and let it eat away at you.

What’s the point?

Yes, issues will come and go, it’s what life will do to us all. But why consume more energy than is necessary? It is an issue that needs to be dealt with and then move on. Don’t let whatever it is, permeate inside of you as you will reduce your lifespan if you do too much of this!

Simple Approach

Enjoy every day because you “choose” to

Understand that life WILL throw things your way, it IS what life does. Some issues will be big and some will be huge. They all need to be dealt with, but they cannot “consume” you!

Just choose to have the attitude that whatever issue it is, is merely a “life lesson” that you have to navigate and deal with. The difference is that it is a lesson external to you.

Yes, you have to deal with it, but you keep it external. You don’t choose to let it affect you and enter inside of you. Doing this, as mentioned above, will reduce your life expectancy and you will likely get ill. Internalising issues that come your way is not a good tactic.

The difference between the two approaches as to whether you have a “simple” approach or ” complicated” approach, is your attitude

How you see the challenges according to your attitude will determine how you resolve them and ultimately have they will affect you physically and mentally

So facing issues with the right attitude determines whether life is indeed simple or complicated

I have just had Covid 19

It was one of the scariest and traumatic couple of weeks of my life. I have had friends who have lost their lives due to Covid and have heard stories of other “friends” and colleagues having had Covid too with varying levels of illness.

Fortunately, up to this point I had managed to avoid it. A combination of having two doses of one of the approved British vaccines and married with being careful when outside the house going to different events/places. etc.

Whilst this has managed to help keep it away from the family home, you always have that thought in the back of your head that one day it may come along anyway. I was hopeful that if we were unfortunate and did indeed contract it, I may be one of the lucky ones and not end up in hospital but rather just get flu-like symptoms

Well, as I said I did get Covid, but the symptoms were indeed fairly severe. At one point my blood oxygen level (referred to as sp02) was down to 88. Now the standard range of this sp02 “should” be between 95 and 100, so anything below 95 worries medical staff as your body cannot sustain itself.

Mine as you can from above was a bit below the minimum threshold married with a very high fever over 40 degrees. These were definite stats that meant I should have been admitted to the hospital and be treated there!

However, these figures were measured and recorded during the middle of the night whilst I was in the midst of the fever. I was unaware at the time, that these figures were not good, so instead,, I remained tucked up in my own bed struggling for breath

The following morning as I was still pretty bad I seeked medical assistance by ringing the medical services here in the UK. The doctor I spoke to over the phone wanted my previous night’s readings which I gave him over the phone. He said I needed to go to hospital straight away if my readings were the same now as overnight.

He asked me to measure them again whilst he was on the phone and thankfully they had gone up somewhat to relieve the immenet danger. This meant I didn’t need to attend hospital straight away, but I was informed I needed to check them every couple of hours and if they dropped again, I was to go straight to the hospital, no messing about.

My breathing was still laboured but I wasn’t in as much discomfort as during the night.

The whole episode was rather unsettling but thankfully things started to gradually and slowly improve over a number of days.

A couple of weeks on since contracting Covid, I am still not 100% right. I still struggle for breath at times as well as being weak just going up the stairs. So by no means have the problems completely gone

So in summary, everything has been totally on hold whilst I was ill.

Why am I telling this story you may ask? Well any goals and aspirations you may have will come to a halt (or be severely impacted) if you health is compromised. So the point is to look after your health and try best to keep as healthy as you can, as any goals and dreams you have can be stifeled or parked altogether if your health is not right.

Now I am not saying you cannot succeed if you have health issues, as that is not true either, as there are many examples of people who have succeeded despite health problems.

But when your health is not right, it can certainly hold you back. So ensure you look after your health as best you can and don’t damage your body intentionally by doing things you know clearly are not good for it. If you get ill due to natural factors, then that is just a fact of life. But if you aid the breakdown of your body by abusing it such as taking drugs, smoking, excessive drinking to name a few, then you are not helping yourself maintain healthy in order to pursue your goals

I have many friends who fit into several brackets.

Some are very focused on a goal and do all they can to achieve it at the expense of so many other things…

Whilst there are some, who don’t appear to be goal-focused at all, but instead seem to drift from day to day, without being motivated by anything it would seem? They have each day blur into the next and so on.

Now to be honest, in my opinion, these are both at the extreme end of the scale. You see chasing your goals without and regard to “life” as it happens, is at one end of the scale, whilst those who merely drift through life are at the other end.

Neither is really that good at all. The former are SO driven to reach their goal, that they can alienate all those around them whilst persuing the goal. Because they are so driven, means they will inevitably reach their target. However, if that success cannot be shared with those around you, then you do need to ask, what was the point in the first place?

Yes, it can be a noble achievement to reach your goal, but if you are at the summit on your own with no one else recognising that achievement, it can lead to severe disappointment.

Many who have reached a goal in this manner, report that reaching that goal wasn’t as good as they had originally anticipated. They then look back at the journey and notice the “destruction” they have left behind and only then realising their tunnel-visioned pursuit has damaged others on route.

Then you have those who don’t appear motivated at all, as described previously, and they drift through life. They don’t appear to use their talents for anything meaningful and have no energy, no lust for life, nor do they have any purpose either? The spring in their step is not there and generally, they are not the best people to be around.

So drawing a line with either of these two types of people at either end, shows that you need to aim, somewhere on that line, where YOU are comfortable. Not at either extreme end.

Personally, I believe you should aim to be more towards the goal-orientated side, but also to remember to stop occasionally along the journey of success, to pause and appreciate the view along that journey, especially shared with loved ones.

This way you still have a goal or purpose to aim for, giving you direction in life, but you then inspire others to embrace and support you on your journey, as opposed to alienating them.

This way, when you do reach your goal, you will have a number of cheerleaders celebrating your victory.

Also, you will discover that the journey to get to your goal was AS important as the goal itself.

I don’t normally like to create posts that have a political theme, but because of the goings-on in Afghanistan, I felt the need to make a point based on what has been happening over there.

On many of the major news outlets, we have witnessed many thousands of people fleeing the new Taliban regime. Frightened people making their way to the airport for evacuation with any few possessions they are permitted to take with them, and for some, they literally are having to leave with only the clothes on their backs.

Once safely away, they have to try and start a new life in another country, which can be so different to the place they are just leaving. However, because they have managed to get away with their lives, they are grateful for any opportunity.

This is not a situation isolated to Afghanistan. People in many other places around the world, and obviously currently in Afghanistan, are having to run away from everything they have had, just to survive persecution (and potentially even death) under various strict regimes.

We in the West are SO fortunate.

Many of us simply don’t realise the paradise we are living in, compared to some places around the globe.
We live in societies that most of the world’s populations would trade with us in a heartbeat, and we “still” find time to moan and groan about the little things which are really inconsequential and meaningless.

We can get upset with not having the latest iPhone or latest Android gadget, or get worried and concerned that we may not look that great on social media.
We SO have to get into perspective, just what IS important in life.

Many things in Western societies are almost handed to us on a plate. So this can create a group of people in society, who believe they are simply entitled to expect things to be given to them without having first earned their way. This entitlement and constant “ease” of obtaining most of the things they desire, makes “physical things” important to collect. When in reality, physical things have no true value at all.

First off, we should be grateful, that by and large, the majority of us don’t live in fear.
We don’t face the potential threat of someone knocking on our door in the middle of the night, accusing us of having done something fairly innocuous, but therefore worthy of enslavement or even death, in the eyes of the authorities.

Secondly, we have relative abundance. By and large, we can get what we want, when we want it if we have earned it.

Thirdly, most of us live in freedom and are able to do what we choose; go where we want and say what we wish; without fear of persecution.

So when you next feel the need to grumble about missing out on the latest fad, device or clothing, or feel that your social media image is being tarnished, step back, have a look at the bigger picture and realise that these things are indeed meaningless in the greater scheme of things.

Instead look and appreciate the “real” important things in life, like living in peace, having abundance and having our freedom to do what we want.
These are the true things we are fortunate to have, that so many other people around the world, crave!

Have you had to put yourself “out there” especially online, for a business, hobby, church or charity but had some feedback that wasn’t as great as you had first hoped?

Well, this unfortunately is part of the journey. As soon as you raise your head above the parapet, you will get some people slinging mud at you!

It is just one of these things and you shouldn’t take most of the stuff personally anyway, even if it appears directed personally at you. You have to develop a little bit of a thick skin if you want to succeed and move forward in whatever you are trying.

Remember, some people are struggling to like themselves and find it far easier to have a go at other people for their own shortcomings. This gives them a short term “feel good”, but it doesn’t last. This is because the problem is with them all along and has nothing to do with you.

Most of the negativity that we are subjected to is from online sources and very rarely would some of the words people write, ever be used in a face to face scenario.

So remember, don’t take things personally if you are criticised online and you believe others don’t like you. Because the problem is likely with them rather than with you.

Although “thinking things through” is a good approach before taking most actions, sometimes some people get muddled up using this thinking with “every decision that is needed to be made“!?!

On some occasions “overthinking” will just cause paralysis and you may miss out on the opportunity or situation presented.

So you need to make sure that what you are “thinking” about or deliberating about is warranted for the situation that has been presented to you.

There is no point overthinking a decision that doesn’t have long term repercussions. In this scenario, a quick response is perhaps warranted. And you can go with a “gut” feeling if this is the way you happen to operate

On the occasions where the decision has long term repercussions, then of course this is the time when you DO need to take time and think through the decision. Because getting these types of decisions wrong, could have lasting long term issues

So you may be wondering what is the right approach?

Well, each scenario is different and there isn’t a “one size fits all” correct approach!

You need to gauge whether the scenario presented will have long term repercussions for you or others. So you should approach each decision and ponder whether the outcome could have a bearing in a year’s time or even more? And this outcome may not be just what happens to you, but to anyone important to you too!

If it does, then ponder and DO take the time to come to your decision.
And if NO is the correct answer for this particular circumstance, then say “NO” too!

If on the other hand, the decision is a simple as picking a film to watch, then it doesn’t need this sort of long thought out deliberation and a swift choice is simply needed

But a word of warning…DO “think” about the decision, even if you believe a simple quick answer is warranted. Because you may be surprised that even a simple decision on the surface, could come back and bite you in the bum later!

However, you’ve got all the power and internal magic already to deal with anything life throws at you. Understand, this is what life does…sending you challenges to see whether you’re worthy.
Each challenge you are given is merely a life lesson, that you need to learn and grow from.

Sure, sometimes you may think, “come on, I’ve had enough already…!?!”

And you will most likely also say, “No, why me, again!?!”

You will also wonder at times if you can indeed deal with all this “stuff” that comes your way and simply struggle (and hope) to keep your head above water.

But understand, this cr!p is all part of life’s journey and sent your way for YOU to learn from.

So the end result of all these life lessons?

A stronger version of you! Yes, I know whilst going through all the pain, you may think, “why me?” – but this is just so you grow, despite the angst whilst in the middle of the struggle.

So if you are unlucky to get anything like this again in future, you are firstly equipped to deal with it AND you have also gained valuable wisdom to pass these life lessons on how to overcome the challenges, onto others!